When we think about not knowing what to do with our lives, we are normally riddled with shame, embarrassment and negative self-talk. I want to change how we think about this part of our lives where we aren’t completely sure of our next steps. This change won’t happen overnight but I think a good place to start is to introduce some positive ways of looking at your current position.
Plan for the future, have dreams, and goals. Just allow yourself the space to be present and to enjoy the moments that come your way.
There has been a lot of talk of people letting go of the time-restricted life goals we set for ourselves. Growing up I thought 25 was the perfect age to have my life sorted out. I somehow expected everything to just fall into place when I hit 25. Now that I am here I just have to laugh because honestly, I would cry. Although throughout my life I haven’t exactly stuck to any solid plans and didn’t do things the way I thought I would, I still expected to turn 25 and just have it all together.
Redefining Happiness
This year I came to the realisation that going at my own pace, and just taking the experiences that come my way as a way to learn more about myself is something I am actually okay with. I still have those moments when I feel like I could do more and I’m just not doing enough, but when those thoughts arise, I remind myself that it is not a race, granted we do not live forever, but you will be much happier living in the moment, instead of fighting those moments of uncertainty.
Having people around you who expect you to do great things can make it difficult to make choices that benefit you, however you can still be great, do great things and true to myself at the same time.
Enjoying The Process
How do you know what you want for yourself when you haven’t experienced anything?
Choose to use those moments of uncertainty to try new things, step outside of your comfort zone. find yourself getting drawn closer to your purpose by exposing yourself to experiencing a variety of new things.
Uncertainty is uncomfortable and I do find myself feeling anxious and self-critical when I am unsure of my next move. However, changing your mindset to accept that you may be unsure at the moment but you can still enjoy yourself is something that can help bring you back to the present.
It’s bloody scary however it is also real, it is authentic, it is freeing, it’s exciting and it all creates the space for growth. Dedicate this year to being more intentional with your mental health, spend time developing new skills, level up on the skills you already have and find ways to grow your confidence. Trust that everything will fall into place when you are doing the self work.
Acceptance
I may not know exactly what it is I want to do, but I know whatever it is I will be prepared for it, and even if I am unprepared for it, I will be able to do the best I can at that time and I can ALWAYS learn.
Know that with each experience you’re closer to where you want to be, whilst simultaneously being exactly where you need to be right here and now.
Allow yourself to explore, learn, make mistakes, establish some of the things you dislike. You’re constantly moving forward even when you’re unsure. You’re not going into anything blind, you’re not lost, you’re rediscovering the joy of curiosity, that childlike fearlessness and the need for adventure.
SAABIRAH LAWRENCE 